Tints and Shades

to write is to read, to speak is to listen, to be loved is to love.

In my opinion, there are two kinds of positive:  bad positive  and  good positive. 1. Bad positive Aren't we all tired from the constant force everyone is giving us to stay positive? "You can do it" and "it will all be worth it" seems all too cliche and overrated. Going through 22 years of life, my best attitude towards challenges is admitting that life sometimes is crappy. To not admit you're hurting, will hurt you. Why would you add another pain to your painful self? Seriously. After all, trying to be positive is an effort doing bad, more than it does good. You know why? It's because you are trying so much to be positive although you know things are just plain bad. You're repressing all your negativity to your unconscious, and not actually trying to deal with that. You're concealing, not dealing .  Battle of the mind, battle of the mind.  You feel frustrated and harsh on yourself, and that discrepancy between your ideal self and your  rea...

Malam itu aku berdiri menghadap penyeberangan. Aku melihat ke depan dan menatap orang-orang yang di seberang. Mereka melakukan hal yang sama. Mereka semua menunggu. Menunggu hingga angka-angka warna merah itu menunjukkan bilangan 0. bukan tempat tujuan, namun sekedar tempat bersinggah bukan tempat yang dituju, namun sekedar tempat menuju menunggu terasa lama, melewati terasa singkat. menunggu terasa lama, merasa pun tidak sempat. semua lalu-lalang ke dua arah yang berbeda akankah aku terdorong ke arah yang berbeda atau bisakah aku sampai di tujuan dengan selamat? aku ingin pulang, aku ingin pulang, kaki ini ingin melangkah, tetapi aku tak sampai, mungkin belum saatnya aku sampai,

it's sad how the tree needs the sun, but the sun would still shine as bright without the tree. it's unsettling how the tree would always look up to the sky, yet the sun is never seen looking back. it's upsetting how traces of the sun lingers in the skin of the tree, but to the sun the tree is a tree among the trees. it's life when the tree is all dried up, yet the sun is still in its glory.

you stole my dream you stole my dream when the sun sleep i am falling deep you stole my dream you stole my dream the dream i long so long the dream i try to hold on to you stole my dream you stole my dream the void is eating every piece the void is swallowing every oxygen you did not, you did not i'm incapable of understanding

if only you could. if only you could. // if only you would. it's dark and occupied inside bars and wars overlapping both fighting in accordance to the still and tense body still, it is outside shaking, it is inside calm, it is outside mad, it is inside you, breathing corpse featured with bloodshot eyes those pale cheeks and lips can be seen despite the vibrant colors /rip it off, rip it off/ there you lie unconscious in the quiet day and night this weak form won't budge though trying with all your might /waking up, waking up/ inhale that different stillness oh the stillness of water the firmness of a rock through it all stay still, my soul if only you would. if only you would. // only if you would.

Behind her sanity Beyond her simplicity Looked for something that will mend her It is in written words she finds shelter