Tints and Shades

they told us to look within that we are all wonderful in our own way or so they say life just has lots of edges the more you look inside the uglier it gets the deeper you search within the darker it gets we all have shadows within us it scared me we do have that same endless black we all do it suffocates you but it's not enough to kill you it strangles you but you have the strength to fight back you're stronger than you think you're not fine but it's okay to not be okay it's okay to not be okay but through it all when it's getting hard to breathe when it's getting hard to stand on your own when it's getting hard to live you know i'll be there i'll be there i'll be there

cliff head goes left right yet they all stays night still staying pit black trapped in a misery of confusion of dilemma to be happy to not be happy to be grateful or to thrive for more that you can never be grateful it feels right to be wrong but it's wrong to be right to be or not to be and i say, do we even have the freedom to (feel, be) ?

It's amazing how I always resort to writing every time I have so much on my mind. It's somehow relaxing and comforting to be able to pour out everything that has been occupying me into words. Writing makes me think of what to write. Thinking of what to write makes me focus on thinking of what to write. Focusing on that particular thing makes me momentarily forget just the list of things I have to do and how heavy the things I have to bear. I ain't complaining, I needed time. Time to be recharged. Time to breathe. And maybe time to heal. I needed space. Space to be creative. Space to not be occupied. And maybe space to live. There. I said it. I said it. But amidst me writing this, something just occur to me. Maybe this IS how we live. Humans are supposed to live being occupied. Because that's the point of living. To feel exhausted. To feel pain. Because only by feeling those emotions, will you realize. That you are indeed alive.